One step closer to my flying army of Mexicans. Excellent...

What do they make awesome, exactly? Anything and everything. Computer ungodly slow and full of maximum suckage? Add rockets. Chair not as comfortable as you’d like? Rockets would probably distract your attention from severe back pain. Belt not giving you the support it should? Rocket power that beyotch!

Juan Manuel Lozano is one man who understands the ways of the world and that everything ordinary can and should be made extraordinary via rocketawesomesauce.

Rocketbelt + Squinched-Face pose = Chick Magnet

This is too cool for words. I mean, it’s a rocket, but it’s a belt. It’s a Rocket Belt. Don’t think that’s awesome? Well, wtf have you done with your life? Why don’t you just sit your ass on a bike, make like a one-testicled American international sports super star, and ride the hell outta here?! But before you go, make sure to put rockets on it.

Science's answer to uncool bikes, everywhere.

This bike, also made by Juan Manuel Lozano, goes down the quarter mile in about 5 seconds. You can be sure that a ride on this will get you so many chicks, you’ll need a giant mansion located somewhere in Utah to be even remotely socially accepted for your woman-hording ways. Crash on it for maximum chick-magnetism.

Don’t worry about kids, though. This thing will probably permanently distort any genitalia you have into a mass of indeterminate grotesque. Enjoy the women.

[-] Author Bio [-]

Zeblue is an amateur graphic artist and blogger, who is hopelessly addicted to Twitter and all things geek. It is his passion to share geek awesomeness that brings his articles to iGeekTrooper, Necessary Cool, Murmur, zMoPo and ZebluePrime.com. Be ready for more.